Milestones

I'm a numbers person so I always remember dates.  Tuesday, 10/15, my grandmother turned 99!  That is so amazing.  I love my grandma and have good memories with her eating grilled cheese sandwiches, green beans, hot chocolate and playing card games.  We got Tacy's middle name partly from my Grandma Cramer.  However, I know that as neat as it is that she is 99, she would much rather be with my grandpa.

The other big milestone of this week is that today marks 10 years since I was diagnosed with diabetes.  I didn't even realize it until I was driving home from school today (that's how long it took me to remember that today is 10/17).  Part of me is amazed that it has really been that long and the other part of me is still sad.  Diabetes changed my life, no doubt about it.  Before I was diagnosed I wanted to be a teacher and teach math, specifically algebra.  I was a skinny little kid who could eat anything and never gain a pound, which was frustrating to me because I wanted to be able to donate blood and was tired of people thinking I was anorexic or bulimic.  I remember that the week before I was diagnosed I had bought a brand new pair of jeans that were size 3.  I ate a lot of food and drank a lot of water.  My mom started to become concerned and took me to the doctors.

That was a traumatic doctor appointment for me because they ran every imaginable test on me (including a pap smear).  The last thing they did was check my blood sugar.  I was 593 (normal is 80-120).  I remember that I had eaten a poptart and drank a lemonade before going to the doctors and tried to tell the nurse that that was why I was probably so high.  The nurse told my mom and I that I most likely had diabetes.  My mom looked like she was in shock.  I was actually a little relieved because I was worried I had a tumor or something (some people thought my stomach looked distended).  We were then told that I needed to go to the hospital for testing to see if I really was diabetic.  I was upset about this because I had a student council slumber party that night (it was a Friday).  We went home and got a few things and my mom called some men over to give me a blessing.  Then we stopped by Carl's Jr because I was starving.  We got to the hospital and I was told immediately that I couldn't eat anything until my blood sugar dropped (my blood sugar was now 619).  I thought that was the worst news ever!  I was told I would be there all night and that a doctor would talk to me in the morning about diabetes.  I had to call my friend Ashley to let her know I would be at the slumber party.  My mom left to go home and I had a night with little sleep in the Special Care Unit (step down from ICU) as I got poked every 1-2 hours for new blood tests.  Morning finally came and my blood sugar was under 200 so I got to eat.  The nurse explained how many carbs I could have so I ordered as many non carb food items I could because I was starving.  I believe I had cheerios, sausage, eggs, toast, and bacon.  My dad was so surprised to walk in and see me eating eggs (I wasn't a big egg person).

The endocrinologist came and talked to me about diabetes and the first thing he told me was that there was no surgery that could fix me.  I don't remember all he told me specifically but I remember asking him if I could still eat and he laughed and told me that I could eat what I wanted but that I just had to take insulin for it now.  I was relieved.  Then I spent a boring weekend in the hospital being taught, watching videos, etc.  I was finally discharged Monday and was so happy to be outside again.  My dad took the whole family out to dinner and I was so happy until I realized that I had no idea how many carbs were in everything and did not have insulin with me.  I had a panic attack.  I think I went back to school on Wednesday after I saw the endocrinologist again and he gave me a novolog pen that was easy to carry and use at school.

In 2.5 weeks I gained 25 pounds.  I couldn't fit into those new jeans anymore.  Not easy to handle when you are 16.  Now I can laugh at it all but I will always remember how hard it all was.  It still is hard sometimes now.  Diabetes never makes life easy or cheap.  Diabetes is what made me want to become a nurse.  Diabetes helps me to be more empathic to patients I work with.  I love being a nurse now and being able to help people and look forward to the day when I am a certified diabetic educator and can help teach other diabetics and get them through the hard times.

For a quick Tacy update: She is 14 months old as of 10/8, she walks around everywhere and has 5 teeth now.  She is a busy kid who makes me laugh all the time even when she is throwing tantrums.